Weekly Calendar 3/28-4/3

FRIDAY, 3/28

12:30 p.m. Lecture. “Policies and Their Analysis” by Kathi Fisler, of Worcester Polytechnic Institute. Wow, that sounds fascinating. Old Laundry Building

3 p.m. Tea. I’m getting so cray before graduation, you don’t even know. I’m gonna do all the stuff I’ve always wanted to do. Rose Parlor

3:30 p.m. Lecture. Avi Widgerson, “A World View Through the Computational Lens.” Time, space and the cosmology of computational problems. Is this, like, the Matrix? Rocky 305

7 p.m. Beer Tasting Mini Course. First class: Pass out and go through syllabus. Week one — Life After 40’s: 30 racks. Faculty Parlor

10 p.m. QCVC Drag Pageant/Mug Night. Come for the cock, stay for the boobs. The Mug

SATURDAY, 3/29

10 p.m. Roaring ’20s Night. Wait a second… Students’ Building, Second floor

10 p.m. Class of 2009 Mug Night. Roaring ’20s Night and Class of 2009 Mug Night are on the same night? What incompetent fool made this scheduling blotch? The Mug

SUNDAY, 3/30

8 p.m. Philaletheis Play. “A Typographer’s Dream.” A typographer, stenographer and geographer discuss their careers. I wish it was a career panel. Sanders Physics, 207

MONDAY, 3/31

3 p.m. Tea. I’m sleeping with all the professors. ALL of them. Rose Parlor

3:30 p.m. Stress Reduction Workshops. Led by an experienced professional of “Osaka Spa Trucker Stop” on I-95 in South Carolina. Kenyon Hall, Club Room

TUESDAY, 4/1

3 p.m. Tea. And of course, the usual, sex in the libs, the roof of the gym, all the normal places. Rose Parlor

5:30 p.m. Lecture. Ted Rybka, the Director of Sports Media for the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, will discuss the media’s role in shaping perceptions of LGBT people. New on Bravo! Transexual Eye for the Transgendered Person. Blegen House

5:30 p.m. Lecture. “Snow is Good, Worms are Bad: Winter Climate Change, Invasive Species and Ecosystem Services in Northern Hardwood Forests,” by Peter M. Groffman. Followed by a student lecture entitled “Cocaine is Good, Anal Worms are Bad.” Rocky 300

9 p.m. Founder’s Day Food Committee. Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s’mores, man...Cap’n Crunch with the little Crunch berries... We need two big pizzas, man, everything on ’em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons. CC, 240

WEDNESDAY, 4/2

3 p.m. Tea. Steal a golf cart and drive it into Sunset Lake. Rose Parlor

5:30 p.m. Lecture. “Our Space: Negotiating Artistic Territory in St. Petersburg,” a presentation by Ivan Govorkov and Elena Gubanova, and how these artists effectively gentrified the Gypsies out of BrØØklÿÑ, an area on the outskirts of the city. Taylor Hall, 203

5:30 p.m. Bookstore Public Forum. A panel of college representatives will lead a community forum. Refreshments will include Starbucks coffee and oranges from New Zealand. Students’ Building, Second Floor

8 p.m. Russian Sci-Fi Cinema Fest. Stalker (1979). Viewer beware: This is likely to be the most haunting film you’ll ever see. It’ll make you change your privacy setting on Facebook! Rocky 200

THURSDAY, 4/3

3 p.m. Tea. Um and what’s left, I guess streaking through the Quad! And the Library and the Rose Parlor and Noyes and the Retreat and the THs...Rose Parlor

5 p.m. Panel Discussion. “Drugs: Mind, Body, and Soul.” Hosted by three professors from various departments, if they remember to show up. Villard Room

7 p.m. Bondage Workshop. Suzanne Sxy Sadist will teach a workshop devoted to bondage. This will be a hands-on event, but also clothes-on. If an article of clothing needs the word “assless” to describe it, it still counts as clothing, right? Faculty Parlor