Letter From Abroad | It's all Russian to me: Struggling to communicate

Jocelyn Durkay Guest Writer

Communication—it’s a vital aspect of day-to-day human interaction the world over. I am reminded of this fact every day here in Russia as I go through my routine. Back at Vassar, I would shrug my shoulders when asked how I could study in Russia on the Vassar St. Petersburg Program with no knowledge of the language. I knew it would be difficult, but wasn’t prepared for how arduous it is.

Upon arriving in St. Petersburg, I was alternately giddy and calm while soaking up the city. But once I arrived at my host’s apartment, that excitement was replaced by anxiety. I was blessed with a host who spoke English, but soon after my arrival she left for a few days, leaving me with her cousin who spoke no English at all. What followed was both the most terrifying and rewarding moment of my life.

While sitting across from my temporary host, Iulia, I tried to communicate. It was quite a challenge, but with my dictionary and phrase book (and some pantomime), we were, remarkably, able to conduct a conversation. Never had discussing the weather been more welcome to me.

Weeks later, I came to the conclusion that this was living life in its most essential form: communicating and gaining perspective across cultures. At that time, nothing mattered more than establishing a human connection.

Halfway through the semester (and after studying Russian for a month and a half), I needed a pass from my university and was required to communicate that need, alone, to the art history department secretary. She spoke quickly, I was not used to her accent, I knew limited Russian and I could barely answer her questions to my embarassment. I did understand, however, when she told my professor that I could not comprehend anything she said.

The interaction made me frustrated at my own incompetence and gave me an awkward feeling of guilt. My initial conversation with Iulia may be listed under the heading of “triumph,” but this second conversation was an uncontested defeat. While successful in my query, I failed in language. My ability to get the pass was entirely dependent on the linguistic finesse of other individuals, leaving me—the boorish foreigner—ill-equipped to accomplish a seemingly simple task.

Every day in Russia is marked by a series of defeats and victories as I try not to seem crass and incapable. Now that I’ve learned the value of speech I can no longer take conversation for granted.

Learning Russian is enjoyable, and there are few things more satisfying to me now than a successful conversation for me (though I admit I have had very few). There are also few things more exhausting. Studying a language here amid the native speakers has taught me less about conjugations and more about the inestimable value of expression.