Weekly Calendar 4/14-4/20

FRIDAY, 4/14
3 p.m. Tea. “At Vassar, sex isn't injurious,” Rose Parlor

7 p.m. Film Screening. Syriana. Um, the country is called Syria. You can’t just make it a girl because you want to. Oh, I’m going on vacation to Paris, Francella. It doesn’t work like that. Blodgett Auditorium

9 p.m. No Offense Comedy Show. There are some things that even marijuana can’t make funny. Ohhh, snap. Sanders Hall, 212

10 p.m. (International) Noise Conspiracy. Watch kids from Bulgaria, kids from Ecuador, and kids from Connecticut pretend they’re in NYC and Tokyo and duke it out on the dance floor. Villard Room, Matthew’s Mug, Main MPR

SATURDAY, 4/15
11 a.m. Earth Day Fest. Love the earth, love the quad, love Thursday a little early. Quad

1 p.m. Men’s Lacrosse. Vassar vs. Hamilton. According to the Duke Daily Sun, the Hamilton lacrosse team came to Durham and planted press-on nails and a self-tanning kit in their lacrosse team’s house in order to make it look like they were cross-dressers. Prentiss Field

8 p.m. Play. “Lorca in a Green Dress.” When I was little, my parents thought I was nuts, but it turns out I just didn’t like green dresses. Susan Stein Shiva Theater

SUNDAY, 4/16
Noon. Men’s Rugby. Vassar vs. Bard College. Brewers vs. Baarvarks: the ultimate showdown. The Farm

5 p.m. Easter Sunday Services. Every year we put an Easter egg on the seder plate to remind ourselves that some people aren’t Jewish. Chapel

MONDAY, 4/17
Noon. NYU School of Continuing Professional Studies. It’s the premiere way to be a professional while still hiding out in grad school forever. CC, North Atrium

3 p.m. Tea. “Though of love we are never penurious.” Rose Parlor

5:30 p.m. Lecture. Dr. John C. Mutter, Deputy Director/Associate Vice Provost at The Earth Institute at Columbia University. I hope that means he’s from that biodome Barnard girls can go to for JYA. Sanders Physics, 207

7 p.m. Lecture. “The Conquest of Garbage.” Heather Rogers, author of the recent book Gone Tomorrow: The Hidden Life of Garbage. She will tell the tale of how the band Garbage overran Eurasia and the entire Mediterranean Bay Area. Taylor Hall, 102

TUESDAY, 4/18
3 p.m. Tea. “Thanks to vulcanized aids,” Rose Parlor

4:30 p.m. Math Lecture. Jacob Fox, MIT. “Ramsey Theory on the Integers, Rationals, and Reals.” Be sure to bring your TI-83+ (Silver Edition) so you can participate. And remember no one likes the asshole with the TI-96. Rocky 310
6 p.m. Lecture. “Progressive Politics and Clean Elections.” Okay, but that really cute mayor of New Paltz is going to be there. What should I wear? Rocky 200

6:30 p.m. Lecture. A talk by the Director of Americans for UNFPA on the environment and family planning. Have babies, don’t let them eat pesticide. Taylor Hall, 203

WEDNESDAY, 4/19
3 p.m. Tea. “Though we may die old maids,” Rose Parlor

4 p.m. Chemistry Symposium. “How Three-Dimensional Structures of Molecules are Determined: A Historical Survey” by Dr. Jenny Pickworth Glusker. Oh wow, the three science majors just came in their pants. Students’ Building, Second Floor

5:30 p.m. Lecture. Warren Allmon, Director of the Museum of the Earth at the Paleontological Research Institution in Ithaca, NY will speak on “The Value of Museums in a Virtual Age.” Two words: gift shops. Aula

6 p.m. Lecture. Vassar graduate Kiana Moore, “Lifetime Transitions: One Transexual’s Story.” Followed by a spoken word piece entitled “One Transexual’s Emotions.” Rocky 300

THURSDAY, 4/20
3 p.m. Tea. “At least we shall never die curious.” Rose Parlor

8 p.m. After Hours. Sarah Brown will be distributing vegan brownies in honor of her birthday. Students’ Building, Second Floor