Life of alum commemorated at memorial

Emma White Contributing Editor

Matthew Carey ’03 died suddenly of natural causes on Friday, Dec. 3 in his Los Angeles home. In an effort to publicly grieve for Carey’s death, current students organized a memorial service on Thursday, Dec. 9 in Rocky 300 with the help of Director of Religious and Spiritual Life Sam Speers and several other campus offices.

Teddy Bergman ’05, Juliette Cohen ’05, Gabe Koplowitz ’05, and Emily Ross ’05, all friends of Carey, organized the ceremony and invited friends, professors, and fans of Carey’s comedic work at Vassar. Carey’s family and fiancée, Lesley Richardson ’02, were contacted and a request was made to film the service, according to Koplowitz.

While at Vassar, Carey was a psychology major with a special propensity for the stage, leading both Improv and The Limit. He was well known for this work, holding extra improv workshops for younger students on Saturdays and organizing campus-wide events, such as the 24-hour improv-a-thon.

The service opened with comments by Speers and Koplowitz. “None of us can be expected to understand the suddenness of Matt’s death, any more than we can understand the finality of death itself. But we can use the occasion of the loss of a friend to think about what it means to befriend,” said Speers. Two short videos of Carey’s sketches in both Los Angeles and at Vassar were then shown. After a song by the Axies, Speers invited members of the community to remember Carey.

According to Koplowitz, “People recounted stories—many of which were humorous—some people read poems, free associated, just about everything.”

An announcement was also sent out via the Office of Alumnae and Alumni of Vassar College to alert alumnae of the service and thus many graduates were in attendance. Of the crowd, Ross said, “I found it really touching that many of the people who attended and spoke noted that they had not necessarily been particularly close to Matt, but the brief experiences they had had with him had left indelible marks on their memories of Vassar.”

A book was circulated throughout the service in which people could record memories of Matt. The book was later sent to the family for the formal funeral held on Tuesday, Dec. 14 in Hyannis, MA, Carey’s hometown.

Said Koplowitz, “One person pointed out, during the service, that it was a testament to Matt that there was more laughter than tears. I think this couldn't be more accurate. The general feeling wasn't ‘let us mourn the premature loss of a great person,’ but ‘let us celebrate the life of that person.’ I think that aspect ultimately made the service an overwhelmingly positive one.”

According to Director of Donor Relations Shelley Sherman, Carey’s family has set up a memorial fund in Matt's honor to support those activities—comedy, Improv, performance—that he loved throughout his life.