Weekly Calendar

FRIDAY, Oct. 8
11:00 a.m.— Volunteer Leadership Conference. For the classes of 1939-2004. Class of ’39 to do special workshop entitled, “Tackling Group Tasks While Playing a Harp on a Cloud.” Sponsored by the AAVC Development and Admission

4:00 p.m.— Tea. Sam and I used to have to tea
together, back when I wore scarves. Rose Parlor

7:30 p.m.— Ferry Residents Arts Night. This week, “The art of smells at Ferry House: cumin and feet.” Ferry

8:00p.m.— Sex: It IS a Laughing Matter. Especially after three double scotches and a matinee of Les Mis. Does pushing rope with a rolled up playbill up your ass ring a bell? I hate online dating. Hosted by CHOICE and Improv. Rocky 300

8:00p.m.— VRDT First Workshop. Seating is VERY limited. (Simply put, blow Tommy Noonan or wait for the DVD.) For reservations call x7470. New Hackensack

SATURDAY, Oct. 9
1:00p.m.— "Liberty Bound." Filmscreening with director. Do people giving talks about liberty in Rockefeller Hall have a moment of pause? Sponsored by College Dems. Rocky 200

6:00p.m.— The Floating Cinema. A 40' barge as a large outdoor screen will feature recent Peter Hutton films. When the screen floats by Yonkers, they switch films to “Inside Lydia’s Ass.” Waryas Park, Poughkeepsie.

SUNDAY, OCT. 10
9:00a.m.— "Design Inside." “The Art of Communicating Life at Vassar." I have a piece in this entitled “Buffalo Wing and Licking Pussy: Meeting your life partner at the Retreat.” Palmer Gallery

1:30p.m.— Women's Rugby. Vassar vs. Sacred Heart University. That sounds totally hot. Farm

MONDAY, OCT. 11
3:00p.m.— Tea. Last time I went to Tea, I pissed the bed. My housemate had to change me in the middle of the night; it was no fun. Rose Parlor

7:00p.m.— Film 392: "The Pawnbroker,” (Lumet/1957). Great post-Holocaust film. I think The Squirel Nut Zippers did the soundtrack. The Rosenwald Theater, CDF

7:00p.m.— Career Recruiting. CIA (U.S. Central Intelligence Agency). Agents must have chin dimples. It’s the CIA for Christ’s sake, look what a good job they do, they gotta be selective. CC Commons

TUESDAY, OCT. 12
3:00 p.m.— Tea. Come and help me pick the lint out of my navel. Rose Parlor

5:00 p.m.— Lecture. Ruth Gilmore, USC, "The Wages of Abolition: Prisons, Women, and the Fight Against Premature Death." And to think she finds the time to do that sitcom with her sisters. Liebe Gott!! Rocky 300

WEDNESDAY, OCT 13
3:00p.m.— Tea. Now that it’s been a month, ask your Student Fellow out to tea. They took the job in order to sleep with you. Rose Parlor

7:00p.m.— Lecture. John Dinges, will discuss his recently released book, The Condor Years: How Pinochet and His Allies Brought Terrorism to Three Continents. His first book, Allende and the Diplomacy of Hors d’Oeurves, is a gas. Rocky 200

7:00p.m.— Panel Discussion. Transfer of Development Rights: Lessons Learned in Techniques of Land Use Planning. What’s the best way to hit on a serf? No, it’s not a joke, I want to know for real. Taylor 203

9:00p.m.— Concert. Performances by bands The Finer Things and The Octopus. Nothing
goes better with hipsters than three-day-old seafood. Mug

THURSDAY, OCT. 14
3:00 p.m.— Tea. I met my first shrink and my second wife at tea. (They were the same person.) Rose Parlor

4:30p.m.— Mexico Summer Program Info. For anyone looking for a fast expensive way to lose thirty pounds. Chicago 137

8:00p.m.— A Cappella 'til You Puke. Annual a cappella extravaganza. It makes me feel like I am being touched in my no-no place. Retreat