lxxxii
2.7.08
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published on 10/29/04
Out of Bounds | American League: A comedy of errors
Gabe Mosca 
Columnist
The World Series is now under way. The St. Louis Cardinals, kings of the National League and victors over the scrappy Houston Astros, now face Boston’s cardiac kids, the Red Sox. With the first two games of the series at Fenway, the Red Sox quickly jumped out to a 2-0 advantage. Due to the deadline for this article, the loyal Out of Bounds readers will have to wait another week for spotty coverage and forced witticisms involving the Boston versus St. Louis series. But that does not mean there isn’t plenty to discuss.
The planets did align themselves. Rodney Dangerfield (RIP) finally got some respect. The Red Sox finally vanquished the mighty New York Yankees. For those recently adjusting their eyes to the sunlight after perhaps two weeks spent in a fallout shelter cut off from the world: Boston defeated New York in the American League Championship Series four games to three. In doing so, Boston rebounded from a 3-0 game deficit and swept the last four games.
As I listened to the final innings on the radio (a superior, more classic way to listen to a ballgame), I thought of a number of questions that came to mind as I took in the magnificence and grandeur of the situation, a 10-3 Boston victory in Game 7.
How will Brian Cashman be killed?
Only the Yankees would have a general manager named Cashman. Maybe it isn’t all his fault, but Cashman must take the blame for assembling a pitching staff without one, ONE, decent left handed pitcher. As David Ortiz and company were raking balls all over the park, one realized that A-Rod’s money may have been put to better use on a weak pitching staff.
Is this the worst meltdown in sports ever?
Yes. The Yanks were three outs from sweeping the Sox and they end up losing the series. This is only the third time in pro sports history a team has rebounded from a 3-0 deficit to win the series, and the other two times it involved hockey teams. Doesn’t count.
How bad did Johnny Damon suck before he stopped sucking in Game 7?
Bad. Radio commentator Johnny Miller suggested that Damon might want to dig a hole and bury himself in it. He was woeful.
Couldn’t the seventh inning stretch use a little jazzing up?
Let me qualify that by saying I am as patriotic as the next guy (easy Ashcroft, easy). I will even sit in my car and listen to “God Bless America” play all the way through instead of shutting off my car and heading inside.
But why must I always listen to the fat, Irish guy with big ears sing “God Bless America” during the seventh inning stretch at Yankee Stadium? I really think that a golden opportunity is being missed here.
The bottom line is that I think a dueling duet with Little Richard and Jerry Lee Lewis, two pianos, a can of gasoline, some Jim Beam, and two dozen Chinese lanterns would really get that crowd a-hopping. Why isn’t anyone thinking outside the box on this one?
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